"Hello, this is Christopher Wight. I'm running for U.S. Congress."
¶ I got this call on Sunday. On Saturday, I received a robocall from Pres. Bill Clinton on behalf of the incumbent Democrat, Carolyn Maloney. So even if I was completely clueless about the Congressional elections before these robocalls, I pretty much know where this guy is coming from.
"I believe that Republicans and Democrats have gone too far to the extremes. I need your vote to bridge the gap and get things done."
¶ Note that he doesn't say which of the two parties he belongs to—and never will in this call—because Manhattan has not sent a Republican to the House since Maloney ousted Bill Green exactly 20 years ago.
"I will cross party lines to create jobs, strengthen our economy, and ensure we have access to affordable, quality health care."
¶ 'If you figured out my party though, please know that I am not one of those no-compromise Tea Party lunatics. But I still want to repeal Obamacare.'
"I have the support of three parties. Can I count on your support?"
¶ For those of you from out of town, New York allows cross-ballot or multi-party endorsements—and I can already guess without looking it up which three parties endorsed him: Republican, Conservative, and Independence. That last one was originally established by the Perotistas in the '90s, but it's lately fallen victim to internal power struggles by some political crazies, and possibly campaign finance theft as well. (Okay, I confess: I initially thought the third of the three parties was the Right-to-Life Party. I forgot that they lost their automatic ballot line status in New York ten years ago.)
"I'm Christopher Wight and I invite you to visit CW2012.com to learn more. Please vote Christopher Wight on Tuesday."
¶ Did you really want to extend that invitation? Because heh heh heh:
• His campaign manager just resigned last week after it was discovered he was behind the anonymous Twitter account @ComfortablySmug that was spreading fake Sandy updates—"Flooding on NYSE trading floor"—and that one got picked up by national media. (I guess I should give Wight props for being upfront about this, but I wouldn't have even known about it if he wasn't putting it out on the street.)
• He's accusing a newspaper of endorsing Carolyn Maloney merely because she bought ad space in their pages and he did not. The fact that this paper—and it's a relatively rinky-dink free neighborhood throwaway he's huffing and puffing over—has consistently supported Maloney during her Congressional career of course does not enter into this supposed devil's bargain.
• From his bio: "After applying to the U.S. Marine Corps Officer Candidate School immediately after September 11, 2001, Chris made a decision to remain in New York City and instead to continue his family tradition of service to country by preparing to run for political office." What, are we supposed to give you points just for WANTING to serve in the armed forces before you changed your mind?
• And, of course, the usual Republican b.s., exaggerations and borderline lies about a Democratic opponent. Like, "Carolyn Maloney has no [health care] plan"—because she supported Obama's Affordable Care Act! THAT'S her plan, dumbass!
"Please vote Christopher Wight on Tuesday."
¶ I hope your old job at J.P. Morgan will still be available on Wednesday.